My husband started having days, then weeks, then months, and finally years where he didn't use drugs or drink. He even quit smoking the swisher sweet cigars he smoked at work. I thought things were really starting to turn around. We were both working, taking vacations with the kids, looking more and more like a "normal" family but the intimacy I craved still wasn't there. I thought it would come in time. We started attending church again and even became the adults over the middle school youth group. Then three years after grandpa's death my grandma became ill with bronchitis and ended up having a heart attack and dying a couple of weeks later. It was so devastating because now both my grandparents were gone. It is a sadness that I cannot explain with words because these were the two people in my life that always believed in me, always loved me unconditionally, and would have done anything for me. They lived for their family and we all loved them beyond words. I can honestly say that after my grandma died nothing has ever been the same. She was the glue that held everything together and holidays have definitely changed.
Shortly after grandma died my husband bought our daughter a horse and we had to have the horse boarded so he thought it would be great to have a home where we could have horses. By this time he had been promoted and was making more money and I had received raises so we decided to build a new house on horse property. It was exciting to see how far we had come and what was possible being drug free. The girls were so excited because we had lived in town where they weren't allowed to play outside without an adult and at the new house we were in the country on a cul de sac with only 8 houses and everyone had kids and new each other so they were allowed to play outside and each parent kept an eye on them so they felt like they had some freedom.
After 9/11 the owners of the company my husband worked for came to all the managers and said they didn't care what they had to do just make sure they kept the numbers up. He wasn't comfortable doing that so he came home one day and said he wanted to open his own business because he thought he could be honest and still make a living without feeling like he had to scam people. So we found a place and he opened his own business. He was correct! He made money from day one. We were watching our savings grow. We were able to travel and buy a new car. Life was good and he was very happy. We still didn't have that intimacy I craved but things were much better and we had the money to go places with the girls and have fun as a family. After about three years he felt like he had outgrown the location that we were in and he wanted to move. We found a bigger facility and were able to partner with a national chain and the business continued to grow. Life was great and our daughter was graduating from high school after only 3 years with honors and going to college on a scholarship in another town about 2 hours from home. We decided that I would take a one year leave so I would be available to help her if she needed it and I could help out at the business too. During this year is when the economy tanked! The business was still doing good and making money but not as much as it had been. After my leave was up I went back to teaching so we would have insurance and extra income in case the economy didn't rebound as fast as we wanted. Oh course it was the worse downturn since the great depression but thankfully the business was still doing good.
During this time someone told me they thought my husband was drinking but I couldn't find any evidence or proof so I thought they were mistaken.
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